show and tell

 

15th October

Warriston again. An hour or 2 in the sun and I was pleased to meet a couple of nuthatches in the secret garden. Not an awful lot else to report. I went along just after 1.30pm.

birdwatching jesus casts his eyes to the skies

Naughty Mary photoshopped him.

To tell the truth I've been doing some photoshopping myself. The photos above and below are not identical. For the sake of modesty, when posting these on facebook I changed the shot below to the one above.

This wee guy was actually very interactive and more bold than most of the Warriston squirrel crew. Nowhere near the botanic's squirrels who will show no fear and eat from your hand, but he would approach to about 2~3 metres and sit happily eating seeds and bread. They are used to the passing canine traffic and quickly run up the nearest tree when chased. They spiral up the trunks confusing the barky mutts chasing them. Good tactic, and would make sense if pursued by a tree-climbing predator such as a cat or pine martin. 

The crows and magpies are also keen on handouts and will watch me luring the squirrels with food, wait till I have retreated, then pounce. In the absence of anything else better to photo I will resort to baiting the tops of headstones, then stand back and watch them try to escape with maximum beakfuls. Neither are my favourite species, or even close to making any top ten lists, but they seem smarter than the average bear, and in the right light can make a decent photo.

another photoshopped effort!

uncensored!

disgusting!
says Hitler robin

So, meanwhile in the secret garden the aggressive little robin (aka Hitler Robin or Radge Robin) is still chasing all the other birds away from his food tables.

In the trees above, another squirrel is trying to assess whether I am friend or foe and watches closely, possibly trying to work out how it can get some food without me eating it. Very little chance of this happening but squirrel brains are not very big and nature severely punishes mistakes in the animal kingdom. 

as so often written on facebook algebra puzzle memes
"you have to be a genious to work this out"

If there is one thing that facebook makes abundantly clear it is that the people who post such 'puzzles' are a long way off genious level. The only puzzle is why several thousand other folk (and most of them probably geniouses as well) reply. Due to the incompetence of the question or riddle set there inevitably could be half a dozen "correct" solutions. Because no recognised methodolgy has been used. ie if A plus B = X. So my answer to the infantile...

would be that the middle 2 lines are wrong (obvs) and the answer is 8 + 11 = 19
I are a genious!

Giving this any more attention than that is just wasting your life. This goes for counting birds, finding a cat hidden in a photo or broadly speaking playing video games. And watching shite on the tellybox. Still it's your life and if you want to watch "celebrities" I've never heard of, dancing/eating jungle insects on Saturday night you are allowed. Just don't complain to me about how banal it is. I think one gets to a certain age and finds many things unspeakably intolerable. I was reassured it wasn't just me recently. I was listening to French and Saunders podcast "Titting About 2" available through Audible. Both seasons are well worth listening to. I'm not a huge fan of them both and I couldn't hack more than 5 mins of Dawn French doing her solo show 30 million minutes which I found utterly dreadful, self indulgent and (worst crime for a comedian) not funny whatsoever. However they work very well in these podcasts; taking a topic per 30min episode (Travel / Pets) and chatting (possibly unrehearsed) about their own experiences of said topic. Both are old enough and funny enough to have a large catalogue of amusing tales and bounce very well off each other. Anyway, JS was recounting her experience of watching the Ch 4 show Naked Attraction. A kind of blind date type show where contestants see each other naked and decide who would suit as a life partner on (mostly only) physical appearance. Needless to say I don't think any couple has managed to get past the first date although many have consumated their unsuccessful date by the end of it, as far as I can see. It is one classy programme and the hostess is so past the point of embarrassment she will often ask the chooser what she/he thinks of the genitals 20" from their faces in earshot of the owner. 

Mary makes remarks about my having watched many epsiodes of this after she retires to bed. And then describing them to her like it was the fall of Rome and with much delighted disgust about who was shamelessly parading what, with neither a shred of embarrassment or pubic hair. Because I have never seen any hair below the waistline on any show I have (yet again mysteriously) intercepted. Like it was somehow appropriate or aspirational to take your grooming cues from porn.

I was very pleased that Jennifer Saunders had seen a couple of episodes of this grim show and read from exactly the same speech I tend to make after watching it. She had also taken exception to the raw rashy patches of recently shaved groin. I feel somehow justified. But I think it is just an age thing. And that really we both just fell into the rather obvious trap of Ch 4 broadcasting the televisual equivalent of clickbait. See also "Breastfeeding My Boyfriend" the other night. I only lasted about 8minutes of that. My only take away was: there is a high percentage of tattoos and piercings on all these progs. Make of that what you will. 

Not much else happening at the feeding tables so I was about to leave when a nuthatch flies in, takes some food, then flies off. All in such a quick flurry of feathers and claws I can't be sure it was defo a nuthatch. However that black stripe across the eyes is unmistakable and so I spent the next 30mins motionless and taking photos as a couple of these masked bandits returned again and again. 

Hitler Robin is none too pleased and flies up to see them off. They have bigger claws and a huge beak and don't take him in the least seriously. He stands about looking a bit foolish then hops into the ivy in a huff. The coal tits make use of his absence and are straight in there. His humiliation is complete. Much as I love him, it is good to see the bully get his comeuppance in the playground.

I have been encouraging him to hand feed and feel we are nearly there. He sits very close by and chats away but as yet hasn't flown the final yard to my hand. Probably knowing every time I appear the bird table bricks also mysteriously provide foodstuffs. There is a whole Winter ahead little Hitler, let's see who can hold out longer!

Although they keep returning the nuthatches do not sit still for photos. Realising in this poor light that most of my photos have movement blur, I instead take videos as soon as the birds land. If they sit still for half a second in the 2 seconds they are on the bricks, I can extract a movie still. I am just thrilled to have seen them this early in the season. And much more convenient than biking out to Cammo where they appear in abundance at that feeding station. Here, they are just a mile from home. Hope this continues through the Winter. Haven't been along much since then as the weather has been dark grey and rainy. 

The secret garden squirrel came down briefly to check for fallen seeds around the base of the tables but there was too much passing (dog) traffic for it, and it scampered back up into the trees.

On my way home I noticed gnats(?) dancing in the sunbeams. Very tricky trying to get them in focus - the camera being inclined to focus on the background. As you can see below I didn't manage! I love the way they hold out their legs in flight and look like tiny fairies.

blue skies and a warm sun - need more of this!