easing into the the hard stuff

 

03-09-22
A new parkrun in Holyrood Park was the inspiration behind the return to competitive running. We felt we should go along and sample the delights of racing round the Queen's Drive as they (Jamie Thin and company) had gone to the trouble of putting this on every Saturday at 9.30am. Just a mile up the road (perfect warm up) and much easier to access than Cramond or Porty. Yes it would be slower, due to hills, but it is such a long time since I have been training regularly for races that any event was bound to be so much slower. So with some reservations we went along, and it was, well.... horrible! (And yet...)

warming up with Nick and Ricky

Rich and son Fionn, and Mary L

and they're off!
Well this isn't too bad - until the hill starts!

Interesting there are no more photos until towards the end of mile 2. Possibly too much trauma to remember to use the camera. I knew it was going to be very bad so deliberately didn't start too near the front, and paced myself going up the long climb to Dunsapie Loch. This was the right thing to do and I made up places rather than dropping them, which adds to the confidence. There is a feeling of relief once you get alongside Dunsapie. I took a bit of time to recover and begin to retrieve the pace. There is probably less than a mile of flat before a small rise then a long downhill. Just before the small rise Rich, pushing his son in a jogger came up alongside and asked how I was feeling. (I had looked at his times and knew this was on the cards.) I replied "silent" which was the shortest phrase I could think of to convey I wouldn't be chatting. I needed all the possible air to go in and out my lungs and didn't have any left over to channel through vocal chords. "Violent?" says Rich not hearing my reply over the rattle of my lungs. I repeated the word and possibly with less patience. He acknowledged my distress and moved forward easily. My thoughts were not particularly kind or friendly. Never mind; nearly at the point where we go downhill. That has to improve things.

I probably struggled up the slight incline before the blessed relief of the brow and descent. I possibly looked at my watch and was surprised it was only about 13 minutes. This torture seemed to have been going on forever and had considerable time still to go. (I knew I would be well into the 20minute plus arena.) 

legend!

The downhill bit was an improvement. So was seeing Scott Balfour, marshalling just above the Commie Pool roundabout. He was kind enough not to point out I looked like a burst tyre. I struggled to put the camera on and take a photo as I passed. You can feel the intelligence drain out of you as all your systems shut down and red lights flash and sirens blare warnings that unless you slow down you are about to have a major coronary incident or aneurysm. Messages are being radioed through from the engine room and Scotty is shouting "ah cannae hold her captain".

Then a terrible thing I hadn't anticipated. The hill runs out but there is still about a quarter mile to go. Any speed I'd built up on the descent drains out of me and I am now wobbling along at tortoise pace. Can it get any worse? YES! There is a small rise opposite Holyrood Palace. Nothing that would normally cause any trouble but it has grown into a mini-everest and I nearly have to walk up it. Young boys, who have never smoked a cigarette in their lives, see the finish line and sprint past. I don't have the puff to say well done. I hobble to the line, whey faced and soaking, just very glad it didn't go any worse and I haven't yet needed the defibrillator they keep near the finish line. 

Nicola D just after summiting mini-everest

I think Rich's son Fionn is looking at me with contempt as if to say,
"me and my dad whipped your sorry ass, fat boy". 

Mary L ran so fast she lost an eye

Bob won (I think)

Mary like myself, happy to have survived.

Michael F who has run some impressive times recently.

The feeling of relief when you stop and find you haven't killed yourself, is profound. You have been trying to squeeze more out of a tube than was ever in it, and it is as hard as holding your breath, while putting your hand over a candle, no, your whole body over a bonfire for 20 minutes. I've never been burnt at the stake but I'd imagine it is very similar. So stopping is great. You feel light-headed for a while and for the rest of the day feel like you are recovering from the flu or from being violently mugged. The return to normal is refreshing. So much so, you maybe think you might do the whole thing next week and make a better job of it, now you know the pitfalls. Probably something you will regret. 

08-10-22

A few weeks passed which included a walking holiday in Spain. Oddly I though all that fresh Spanish air might improve my parkrun time. Hah! Anyway the sun was shining and what with a few weeks going by, I had forgotten just how unpleasant the parkrun experience can be. I had done no speed training and very little running of any sort. Bound to be faster then? Hah again.

Good to see John B who, like myself, has been taking time away from running. Also like myself would not be content to just jog round. Also fun to see Ollie and Vic who we hadn't seen in ages. The socialising aspect to parkrun is a great encouragement to go along and see who else comes out the woodwork. Especially when Mary and I rarely manage along to club these days. When I say these days I mean "in years". Once out the habit of cycling to Porty on a drizzly Weds night in the Wintry dark, it is a dawdle to never bother with that ever again. And not even feel remotely guilty. In fact if it ever crosses your mind from the warm couch in front of the telly with a glass of red in your hand, you might have a nostalgic moment and wish you had more discipline in your life, but most likely you won't.

and before you've asked what am I doing here again?
it's 3, 2, 1, and you're off

up that flippin hill - 7 minutes of ecstasy

seeing the castle about 13 minutes
marks the worst being behind you

the home straight

Steve asking Mary was PB not there today
and Mary pointing at me behind Steve

camera getting the exposure wrong but I like it

15-10-22

There must be some sort joy-of-self-harming that calls us back for more. We fell into the habit of feeling Saturday was parkrun day. It doesn't cost anything and is just up the road. I can't think of a reason not to. Apart from it being really horrible. We haven't done one lately in really crappy weather. Although it is definitely a good hard workout, so if the weather is rubbish it sort of makes sense to go and bash one out, and at least you have made best possible use of the rubbish day. We'll see how things progress through the dark and cold Winter. Mary spent the first few weeks getting a better score each week. So that was encouraging. I got slower each week, possibly because I am only running twice a week most weeks and fewer than 15 miles. My first Holyrood is still the quickest. I might have to restart training again.

JB looking lighter already

Another blast from the past - Martin F

going into the light

Berit (and Mitchell) are regular marshals here.

I saw Martin check his pulse as he finished.
I know the feeling!

Kerry is a regular too.

and Steve again!

05-11-22
Holyrood was cancelled due to the MoRun. £25 for a 5k that was probably much like the parkrun but £25. Somehow this did not seem like something I'd even remotely consider value for money. A couple of days ago I suggested we maybe do Cramond parkrun as we'd be robbed of a Holyrood heartstopper this weekend. I was surprised to hear the words come out my mouth. Mary was up was for it. We invited Steve along in the car (the three of us did a Tuesday workout interval session in an effort to fight off getting old and slow and fat) and Nick (back from abroad) also signed up. 

Steve at the finish line

One of the main draws for me was the flat course would surely produce a faster time than Holyrood and I'd get a massive hike in my good-for-age percentage. This is a score calculated by the parkrun results that takes your age into account by measuring it against the best times in the country in that specific age group. So a 60 year old doing 20 minutes will get a much higher percentage than a 20 year old doing the same time. It does a lot to artificially level the playing field when comparing peoples' efforts against those in different age groups. So although you may finish behind many younger men you often get a higher age graded score. Which is a pleasant compensation. Unfortunately on a slower course like Holyrood you are still compared to those times set on a flat course. So you have to go to Cramond to see a more realistic age grading. Or so I hoped.

Bert, finished.

If Bert is not looking his best, it is because he has just knocked his pan in chasing a good time. He knew he had to get under such and such a time to get over 70% age graded and set that as his goal. He was delighted to exceed that and was happy to run himself ragged in the pursuit. Parkrun has, as its motto, that it is a time trial not a race. You might be hard pushed to realistically find the dividing line there, but what I take from that, is that it is a personal time trial - that you are racing against yourself (and your previous best) rather than anybody else. Although since we are given results where the fastest comes in first and the slowest comes in last I can't see this as anything other than a race. I have always tried as hard at parkrun as I do at any or every event. And being as it is only 5k, (3.1 miles) that pretty much means eyeballs out and sprint from the start line. Not like 100 metres but sharper than a 10k or half marathon.

Unless you train for this distance all the time, it is going to hurt. And even then....

It was damp and nearly drizzly (but no wind to speak of) so I didn't carry the camera. I was aiming for 20 minutes. I was doing 21 and change at Holyrood and it HAD to be quicker. But how much? I had checked the pace and 6.25 minute miling would get me under 20 mins. I hoped I might manage that but wasn't sure after a pretty slow session at PRC weds night training the other week. There was a harsh wind for the return half of the mile reps but by rep 3, I was struggling to do sub 7. I used to go faster than that over the entire marathon. What has my running come to? 

That sort of negative thinking keeps you indoors and eating the wrong foods in front of the idiots' lantern. Much better to get out and brutalise yourself in the name of fitness. If we learned anything from covid it is look after your health and your fitness because it can be counted on to keep you breathing much more reliably than any vaccination or govt advice. When I see very large people I just think wow! bad luck, you're totally fucked.

I set off within myself. I was disappointed by the number of muppets who race like it's a hundred metre dash. I started in maybe 100th place and finished in 49th suggesting 50 folk started too quickly then crashed and burned, or just got slow after a short distance. I ran out of pace around 2k. I was just over 8mins and therefore (5 x 4mins+) unlikely to go under 20mins. I tried not to let that colour the run so began to let the fear of going over 21minutes drive me forward.

Surely I wouldn't be slower than my pb at Holyrood (21.02)? As it turned out after a long unpleasant 20minutes of slamming-your-fingers-in-a-car-door equivalent, I crossed the line in 20.47. My thoughts were split equally between disgraceful and I did the best possible at this stage. But actually pretty disgraceful. (My previous worst at Silverknowes was 18.55 and age graded never below 80%. Today nearly 2 mins slower and 77%.) I should channel that negative reflection into training. Looks like I'm going to have to run more than 15miles a week. Oh well. Time to lean into that.

Mary sandwiched between Shelagh and John

Peter's food hub in Gt Junkie St - just say NO!

Junk Food Fast: Order all your indulgences without even getting the exercise of collecting them in person. I am at a loss as to why this is allowed. Didn't we close a load of places (restaurants and businesses) during covid lockdown to avoid what was feared as a deadly epidemic? So health was regarded as more important than business. Okay take that logic forward. Selling junk food and taking it directly to people's doors is killing them more surely than covid.

Covid was regarded as more important than cancer or heart disease. And yet the deadly epidemics of obesity, cancer and heart disease are killing far larger numbers than covid ever has, and we let these death dealers pack the dimwits with fat and sugar until they have to queue up for a mobility scooter to get down the cigarette shop. Does that make sense? God forbid we hurt anyone's feelings by pointing this out.

Facebook slaps your wrist if you post anything other than the govt line propaganda about vaxing and how it is the only way forward. And yet the fat are getting fatter and are well on their way to bringing down the NHS. And there is talk of banning doctors from raising the topic of obesity with their client base. I predict it will get worse long before it gets better. 

I think I may have accidentally stumbled into at least partly restoring my running mojo. I had been worrying that due to covid and events being cancelled I had stepped so far back from competitive running I began to question the sense of putting myself through the wringer for no obvious reason. I just couldn't see why I should be doing that to myself. I am not sure I am totally back on the wagon (or is it off the wagon?) but I know I want to run faster than the other guy. (And there are more of them than ever before.) I haven't signed up for any races but I do want to get faster and 'enjoyed' the last couple of sessions Mary set up to do high intensity intervals. I also suspect it burns flab better than just about anything else, including taking photos in a cemetery although I intend doing quite a bit of that over the Winter as well. 

12-1-22

Another one last Saturday. Slowest yet - 21.21! Still within the 75% age graded but no great boast. I ran zero miles between parkruns so can't realistically expect improvements. Work is the excuse. (And slacking.) Haven't done any proper running since then although work this week isn't as busy. And another Saturday looms on the horizon. Get that finger out Buchanan!